Wanna be a storyteller? I am not a good one though.

I feel guilty again. Several times per semester I had that feeling. Today I didn't finish my plan. From the afternoon everything went wrong. No, I mean it is just my feeling. Then sb bothered me a lot during the T. I know he is not that bad, but I had no mood for his talks. Then I wanted to talk to sb. but actually there was nothing to say and no one to turn to. A friend showed up but he was more miserable than I was. What was I supposed to do? Right, I could only listen to him and swallowed my painful plain boring long story. I tried to make the namecards. But I had no idea what I could do with them!!! No inspirations. Then right before I was about to read sth, my rmmate was back. She was very tired and went to sleep later. I moved to the common room in the hope that sb would stop by and talk with me. But then we can only have small talks. Amber came in and I found it hard to describe my feeling to her. Coz I know she is having some tough days and I give up storytelling. We watched the movie Double Pupils. We talked duing it and we missed a lot. I don't really get the ending~~ What is the point? This afternoon I watched a Singapore one with Ivan, I can tell they were trying to say sth. to the government. He was laughing all the time. I felt different with different culture backgrounds. Heh I guess even if he is aware of the message he will laugh at it anyway. Like I said it is very healthy to laugh or smile. He is aware of it and he is sb who is going to be a doctor. I recalled the happiest time for today then. ( I am surprised it was not the hours spent with Ivan... I mean it was as fun as it was.) It was the hour when I was having brunch in LG7. Though I wasnt able to get my favourite set, I saw the news report on TV. Well, I dont mean to laugh at others' pain, but it was funny and I was glad that they have the courage to make a step. I wouldnt say it is a leap for it is similar as what they did in the council. I think some demonstrations against corruption in mainland China probably will destroy the country. You won't understand the tradition without any culture or history background. Unlike a lot of countries, China has the tradition of rebels and handover of regimes/dynasties. I mean in the past 5000 years she went through a lot of wars and conflicts, large scale and also locally. Nowadays the problem if not becomes more and more severe, at least hasnt been solved. However, imagine to have a large scale of demonstration all over the country, what will happen? My prediction is the government will use the army to surpress it and make our foreign relationship worse. Coz they have been waiting for this since 1989 and how can they miss it? At first they will propose some sactions and then ask the UN to chagne China's position on the committee. Well, maybe they will not start a war on us coz they know we have nuclear weapons. But they thought Iraq had, did they? I am not worrying about the regime or how people will see us, but the innocent people... I won't see all US people evil, even if they declare wars against some random countries or they shoot some innocent people. I personally think the regime is responsible for their dealings but not the nation or people. Mm, what is a nation? Again it is hard to define. I am farther and farther away from my original point... sorry. You see, I am a bad one. Anyway, I care about people generally. It doesnt worry me that much at this point if Taiwan people want to be independent. Actually it never worried me in the past. I was afraid if they harrassed the mainland government there might be a war. I thought it was very unlikely for mainland government to start it, but I cannot ignore the possibilty. I know it is hard to ask for loyalty from another group of people with different values and backgrounds. But the fact is they will love u and be loyal to u if you are strong and powerful enough. It seems to me that it can be applied to all animals. That's the way we survive. MMm, I am more and more depressing. The world is not perfect.
I like Crissy's line" Every second you waste is candy out of my mouth" the world is not ideal even in her mind but she "fights" for her candies.